“I met New York.
She was far beyond what I could have imagined. Well, at first, she seemed a little all over the place, but she was ‘it’! Glamorous. Affluent. Brilliant. Youthful. Aspirational. She seemed to have it all.
But New York wasn’t easy… Her love language was tough, though I later learned that she did it to make me better, just as she wished for everyone else. New York kept me humbled but also motivated. She inspired me to keep dreaming while staying focused, as dreams require hard work to come true.”
When I wrote this in my blog post 'Tales of the bitches' in 2020, I saw New York at its most vulnerable state ever in the more than nine years I’ve been living here. I’ve seen the city when everyone wanted to move in and also when everyone wanted to move out because of Covid. And likewise, the city has seen my highest highs and my lowest lows, leading me to arrive at simply being ‘happy enough’. It feels like we’ve bonded through our shared vulnerabilities and synchronicities.
It’s the hustle-bustle city that teaches me how to cultivate my authenticity despite external influences. The fast-paced city that teaches me all about slow living. It’s about finding inner peace and tranquility amidst all the noises. The city that’s so desirable teaches me about the power of surrendering and letting go. That progress and transformation aren’t a linear line from the lowest low to the highest high but the continual expansion of consciousness. That every test in life comes with an opportunity for us to choose our response from our lower self or higher self. The city that makes me question everything about my self-worth to recognize who I am. It’s neither about fooling myself into thinking everything’s perfect nor dwelling on past disappointments but about constantly releasing lingering sadness and embracing a positive outlook for the opportunities ahead. The city that heals through tough love, motivating me to achieve everything I want but also detaching from everything I want, enlightening me to realize what I actually need so I can fulfill it.
From trying to get through the days with my head down to walking with my chin up, New York is the place where I have nothing to hide and nothing to fear. Next year will mark a decade since I moved here. Some may say I’ll officially become a New Yorker then, but I don’t even think of it that way. Strangely enough, it never feels like trying to become a New Yorker to me. It always feels like being home, being who I am, taking my time because I know I’m home ❤️
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